Because we'll
be busy in Jacksonville, Fla., next week, this will be our last "Rants
& Raves" before Super Bowl XXXIX. So for all of you Philadelphia
Eagles fans who believe quarterback Donovan McNabb, doting team mother
Wilma and the rest of Campbell's commercial "Mama's Boys" will pull the
upset of the favored New England Patriots on Feb. 6, we have this
polite but pointed message:
NO SOUP FOR YOU!
That's right, Chunky junkies. This Soup Nazi says New England chow-duh
will rule the day at Alltel Stadium as the Patriots win their second
consecutive NFL title and third in the past four seasons. With tight
end Chad Lewis and wide receiver Terrell Owens both out -- no, we're
not buying that T.O. will play on his injured right ankle -- Philly
will be limited offensively, and the Patriots' defense then will be
able to concentrate on keeping talented running back Brian Westbrook in
check.
After New England wins by, oh, nine points, may we suggest to the
Eagles and their fans that they go for something less "Chunky" to ease
their disappointment -- such as smooth, soothing tomato soup? A hot
bowl always made us feel better when we were weally, weally sad. ...
•
Right-wing radio talk show host and failed ESPN football analyst Rush
Limbaugh said on air Monday, "There's no question McNabb has improved
and I'm happy to see it." You'll remember last year Limbaugh lost his
ESPN gig after saying the media was propping up McNabb because there
was an overriding "social hope" that a black quarterback would achieve
greatness in the NFL. (Apparently, Limbaugh had never heard of Doug
Williams, Randall Cunningham or Warren Moon.)
So did Limbaugh come around on his thinking about McNabb this season? Or was it his OxyContin speaking? ...
•
Yes, you knew we would gloat. Just be thankful we waited this far into
the column to "rave" about our prediction last week that the Patriots,
just three-point favorites over the beloved Pittsburgh Steelers in the
AFC Championship Game, would roll by 10 points or more. We wrote that
New England coach Bill Belichick would have the perfect defensive
scheme for the Steelers and their undefeated rookie quarterback, Ben
Roethlisberger.
Three Roethlisberger interceptions and a 41-27 Pats' victory later, we have to ask, "WHO DA MAN?" That's right, "WHO DA MAN?
You know the answer. ...
•
Of course, we had a number of readers who disagreed with us. Some more
strongly than others. We also had those who proposed bets with us on
our established line of Patriots minus-10:
Eric, who described himself as a longtime "reader and hater" of my
columns, agreed to pay $10,000 if I won, but if I lost: "You have to
pack up your (expletive) and get the (expletive) out of town." Well,
E-man, I'm still here.
Mike, a "professional gambler by trade," wrote in to say "I will bet
any amount that you can come up with, if you want to give me the
Steelers at plus 10. If you want to write such things, then I would
like to accommodate you if you want to back your statements up." We
certainly hope Mike doesn't rely on his "trade" to feed his family.
Our favorite offer, though, came from the unnamed caller who wanted to
bet a case of his choice of international beer against what he termed
the "full services of my wife for a day." Now, we almost took that bet
-- just to get our laundry done and our bathroom cleaned. ...
• Talk about contagious: Patriots quarterback Tom Brady had a
103-degree fever the night before the AFC title game, yet, strangely,
it was Roethlisberger who was sick to death once the game was over. ...
• Roethlisberger claimed Tuesday that he broke two toes on his right
foot during the game. Then Wednesday, Pittsburgh coach Bill Cowher said
that was an exaggeration and Roethlisberger had no broken toes. With
the exception, that is, of those toes Cowher broke when he stepped on
"Big Ben's" (sob?) story. ...
• Brady, meanwhile, is suing General Motors because it used his
likeness in a couple of newspaper ads almost a full year after his
contract with the company was up. Hey, it's nothing a simple apology --
taped to the windshield of a tricked-out, pearl-white Cadillac Escalade
with phat 22-inch spinners suddenly parked in Brady's driveway --
couldn't resolve, right? ...
• Away from football, to wrap things up: Swiss tennis player Roger
Federer won his 26th consecutive match Tuesday, a straight-sets victory
over Las Vegan Andre Agassi in the quarterfinals of the Australian
Open. Yes, let the inevitable comparisons to golf's Tiger Woods begin.
Souce: Las Vegas Review
